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Opinion Trump Madness: What’s the quintessential quote of the Trump administration?

We have all your favorites, from the 16 years apparently two months that have elapsed since this president took office. Click your picks with your withered crone hand, vote and see what makes it through the tournament unscathed! And tell your friends about it, if your friends’ lives have also reached this point. It is good, in whatever small way, to feel that you are exerting a measure of control over your life.

If the bracket is not displaying on your device, click here to see it. And be sure to vote! Here are the matchups in the first round:

“This American carnage stops right here and stops right now.” vs. “This was the largest audience to ever witness an inauguration — period — both in person and around the globe.”

“You’re saying it’s a falsehood, and they’re giving – our press secretary, Sean Spicer, gave alternative facts to that.” vs. “I bet it’s brand-new information to people that President Obama had a six-month ban on the Iraqi refugee program after two Iraqis came here to this country, were radicalized and they were the masterminds behind the Bowling Green massacre.”

“I will be asking for a major investigation into VOTER FRAUD, including those registered to vote in two states, those who are illegal and … even, those registered to vote who are dead (and many for a long time).” vs. “We don’t want them here. We only want to admit those into our country who will support our country and love deeply our people.”

“It is impossible to fully fathom the depravity and horror inflicted on innocent people by Nazi terror.” vs. “The acting Attorney General, Sally Yates, has betrayed the Department of Justice by refusing to enforce a legal order designed to protect the citizens of the United States.”

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“This was the worst call by far.” vs. “Frederick Douglass is an example of somebody who has done an amazing job and is being recognized more and more, I notice.”

“The opinion of this so-called judge, which essentially takes law-enforcement away from our country, is ridiculous and will be overturned!” vs. “My daughter Ivanka has been treated so unfairly by @Nordstrom. She is a great person — always pushing me to do the right thing! Terrible!”

“I am looking at two-state and one-state, and I like the one that both parties like … I can live with either one.” vs. “The leaks are absolutely real. The news is fake because so much of the news is fake.”

“They may have been phony in the past, but it’s very real now.” vs. “I’m not Inspector Gadget. I’m not in the job of having evidence.”

“Nobody knew that health care could be so complicated.” vs. “SEE YOU IN COURT, THE SECURITY OF OUR NATION IS AT STAKE!”

“I am the least anti-Semitic person that you’ve ever seen in your entire life.” vs. “This administration is running like a fine-tuned machine.”

“The powers of the president to protect our country are very substantial and will not be questioned.” vs. “HBCUs are real pioneers when it comes to school choice.”

“There were other immigrants who came here in the bottom of slave ships, worked even longer, even harder for less.” vs. “I think that measuring with precision human activity on the climate is something very challenging to do and there’s tremendous disagreement about the degree of impact, so no, I would not agree that it’s a primary contributor to the global warming that we see.”

“If you’re looking at the CBO for accuracy, you’re looking in the wrong place.” vs. “A bill of this size probably isn’t the best use of their time.”

“Terrible! Just found out that Obama had my ‘wires tapped’ in Trump Tower just before the victory. Nothing found. This is McCarthyism!” vs. “How low has President Obama gone to tapp my phones during the very sacred election process. This is Nixon/Watergate. Bad (or sick) guy!”

“Go buy Ivanka’s stuff!” vs. “I would imagine that there’s probably a gun in the school to protect from potential grizzlies.”

“I hope you are as much fun on that dais as you were on your couch.” vs. “I have been called a surrogate at a time or two in that campaign and I did not have communications with the Russians, and I’m unable to comment on it.”

Listen up, softies of America! There's a new budget in town. (Video: Adriana Usero, Dalton Bennett, Dani Player/The Washington Post)