(iStock/Washington Post illustration)
Columnist

Napoleon finished a little bit bad. But I asked that. So I asked the president, so what about Napoleon? He said: “No, no, no. What he did was incredible. He designed Paris.” [garbled] The street grid, the way they work, you know, the spokes. He did so many things even beyond. And his one problem is he didn’t go to Russia that night because he had extracurricular activities, and they froze to death. 

–Donald Trump, to the New York Times, bold mine

Napoleon’s Extracurricular Activities (A Comprehensive List):

  • French
  • Coding
  • Horseback Riding
  • Model Government
  • Modeling
  • Chess Club
  • Urban Designers (The Street Grid The Way They Work You Know The Spokes)
  • So Many Things Even Beyond
  • Height Is Nothing But A Number Club
  • Future Leaders
  • Mountain Climbing
  • Adopt A Highway By Force If Necessary
  • Semester Abroad
  • Euro Challenge
  • Egyptian Antiquities Club
  • Mathletes
  • Senior Retreat Leader