Soon, Jerry Jones can clean his eyeglasses with his very own Jerry Wipes.
Of course, he can.
Jerry Wipes are the “brainchild” of Shy Anderson, Jones’s son-in-law and an internet sensation as the designated cleaner of spectacles belonging to the Dallas Cowboys’ owner/pizza-hawking rapper/trash talker. Soon, they’ll be available on the team’s online store.
Of course, they will.
The custom cloths, Anderson told the Dallas Morning News’ Alan Peppard, will have “Jerry Wipes” printed on them and “can also be used for spontaneous shoe shining, if necessary,” Anderson said with a laugh.
He is, he says, serious about this wipey thing.
“Absolutely,” he says. “It started out as a joke, but let’s see how far we can take it.”
Right to the bank, probably.
And, by the way, Peppard found out what really happened in that MetLife luxury box.
“Jerry never talks to anybody during the game,” Anderson told Peppard. “He is so focused. But he started asking, ‘Where’s [tight end Jason] Witten [he of the injured spleen]?’ I was looking over his shoulder and I could see his glasses were completely smudged. I said, ‘Seriously, Jerry? Let me see your glasses.’ I actually had an eyeglass cloth in my pocket.”
How’s this for a marketing slogan: “Because you don’t have anyone to clean your glasses for you...Jerry Wipes.”