Roger Goodell’s lips are sealed. (Gail Burton / AP)

There’s probably a way, way, way less-than-zero chance that Commissioner Roger Goodell is using human growth hormone, but because it will be a contentious issue for players and the NFL as they, at some point, negotiate a new collective bargaining agreement, he went on a personal fact-finding mission.

Players aren’t eager to agree to testing for HGH because the most reliable tests are done on blood samples, making the tests far more intrusive than urine testing. NFL owners are insistent that the new agreement will include HGH testing, so Goodell submitted to a test, he told USA Today’s Jarrett Bell.

“I just had my HGH tested in the last couple of weeks. I wanted to see what was involved in the testing,” Goodell said. “They came in here at 9:30 in the morning, completely unannounced, and I went through the procedure. The same one our players would go through.”

And the result was ...

“I can't disclose it because of the confidential nature of it. Let me put it this way: I'm proud of my results.”