If you’ve already done the p-Op quiz and you’re already mentally checked out for the holiday weekend, then you have plenty of time to eyeball this week’s fashion faux pas. Last week, I brought you the horror that was President Obama’s brown suit.This week, I bring you Thomas Gore’s hat.

Gore pleaded guilty to three D.C. election law misdemeanors and a federal obstruction of justice charge for his role in a twisted scheme that financed the rival of his boss to help said boss’s chances of winning election in 2010. You might know the boss as Mayor Vincent Gray (D) of the District of Columbia. Now, I know hats made a comeback in recent years. But just because it’s in fashion doesn’t mean it’s for you.


The Offender: Thomas W. Gore

The Evidence: A brown straw hat

The Event: A court hearing to plead guilty to secretly financing a rival mayoral campaign with money orders.   

The Location: Outside the U.S. District Court, Washington, D.C.

The Critique: My beef isn’t so much with the hat as with its appropriateness. There’s just something off about it. Maybe it’s too small. Maybe it’s too reminiscent of Lou Costello. Or maybe I’m suffering from a little green-eyed jealousy. I love hats and how they look on (most) guys. But my noggin’ is too big to pull off the look Gore is going for. The only fashionista-esque hat you’ll see me don requires the high temperature to be no higher than about 25 degrees.

Anyway, perhaps Gore was channeling his inner Andre 3000. That musician and style maven has been rocking hats of all kinds for years. But as Gore proves, not everyone was meant to rock straw.