Sarah Palin, “jerk,” Mark Sanford, “assclown,” nerd prom, basketball, Canada, James Brown, coming out and pre-natal warrior sharks. They all made their way into the national discourse this week. But how?

Let’s scroll!

1.) Tears of an “assclown”: Sarah Palin’s monthly cry for attention included a tart tweet condemning the White House Correspondents’ Association Dinner. “The rest of America is out there working our asses off while these DC assclowns throw themselves a #nerdprom.” Our asses? Someone enlighten me. I didn’t realize the former half-term governor of Alaska, former reality television star, former Fox News contributor and failed 2008 Republican vice presidential nominee was employed.

Sarah Palin at the MSNBC party after the White House Correspondents Dinner in 2011 (Jonathan Ernst/Reuters)
Sarah Palin at the MSNBC party after the White House Correspondents’ Association Dinner in 2011 (Jonathan Ernst/Reuters)

2.) One of their own: If there is bipartisan agreement on Capitol Hill it is that Sen. Ted Cruz (R-Tex.) is a “jerk.” But that’s not stopping him from seriously thinking of running for president in 2016. And why shouldn’t he follow in the president’s footsteps? Obama was also a first-term senator when Oval Office visions danced in his head. Yet, unlike Obama, Cruz wasn’t born in the United States. After giving Obama hell for being born in Hawaii to an American mother, the birthers couldn’t possibly give a pass to a Latino of Canadian birth with an American mother seeking the the White House. Right?

Sen. Ted Cruz (Deborah Cannon/AP)

3.) Womb warrior: The Sand Tiger Shark is so fierce that its offspring learn the lesson of survival of the fittest before they’re even born. According to a new study reported by The Post’s Juliet Eilperin, “When a female gets pregnant, it’s usually with multiple offspring of several different male sharks. As soon as the fetuses are old enough, they begin a cannibalistic battle for primacy in utero, with only one surviving.” When I tweeted this fascinating story out, @cfahooligan quipped, “Is this a metaphor for the current state of the republican party?” Good question.

A sand tiger shark (Michael Sohn/AP)

4.) Say it loud: I’m sensing a trend, folks. “I’m black. I’m gay,” said Nevada State Sen. Kelvin Atkinson last week. “I’m black. And I’m gay,” said NBA center Jason Collins this week. Obviously, the first immutable trait is plainly apparent. But by mentioning their race with their sexual orientation these men are proclaiming their pride at being both. Can’t wait to see who it’s going to be next week.

Jason Collins
(Kevin C. Cox/Getty Images)

5.) Fight night: Mark Sanford (R) stopped haranguing “Nancy Pelosi” for 75 minutes on Monday to debate his real opponent for South Carolina’s 1st Congressional District. But Elizabeth Colbert Busch (D) knew her opponent was on the ropes before they stepped on stage. And she kept him there when she hammered him for his decision to “leave the country for a personal purpose.” POW, right to the kisser.

Elizabeth Colbert Busch debates Mark Sanford (Randall Hill/Reuters)
Elizabeth Colbert Busch debates Mark Sanford
(Randall Hill/Reuters)

6.) Kindergarten cop: “You seem to suggest that somehow these folks over there have no responsibilities and that my job is to somehow get them to behave,” President Obama said of Congress in response to a question about why he went along with legislation to temporarily deal with flight delays. “That’s their job.” After four years of obstruction for obstruction’s sake, what he says makes perfect sense to me.

(Saul Loeb/AFP/Getty Images)