So Virginia Del. Dave Albo (R-Va.) complained in a surprisingly ribald comments on the House floor Friday — set to the music of a classic boom-chicka-wah-wah riff. (No, really! Hey, TGIF reigns, it seems, even in Richmond during the legislative session.)
At issue: The wrenching debate over a bill to require women seeking an abortion to have an ultrasound first. A major backlash to the bill set in when lawmakers realized that for many women in early gestation, the exam would involve an internal probe; Gov. Bob McDonnell, one of the strongest proponents, backed away from it earlier this week.
But first, there was a lot of shouting on the House floor and cable news about “transvaginal ultrasound” and “vaginal probes” and whatnot. Which, according to Albo was a total turnoff for his wife! (see video. . . )
Albo took the floor to explain how eager he was after the ugly debate to get home to his family and his big-screen TV — “a 46-inch screen,” he boasted. As the evening went on, he got some ideas:
“I thought, ‘Wow, the boy’s to bed, the wife’s here. . .” Albo recounted to his colleagues, with a broad wink and a thumbs-up. “We have some red wine. . . .”
That’s about the time Albo hit the button on a music player, right there on the House floor: Boom-chicka-boom-chicka. . .
He went on, about how he sat next to her, put an arm around her. . . “I then turn on the TV to find the Redskins channel — I know you find that weird, but my wife loves the Redskins more than she loves me.”
Instead, what should come up on the super-big screen was his own name. (Albo was one of the Republicans who crafted a compromise to make the procedures optional.) Followed, he said, by “the gentleman from Alexandria’s face” — Del. Dave Englin (D) — “as big as my wall, going trans-v this, and thans-v that!. . . And this goes on and on!”
Punchline: “And the show’s over, and [my wife] looks at me, and she goes, ‘I gotta go to bed.’”
Albo’s story got big laughter and cheers from his colleagues, and he wrapped up by demanding an apology from Englin: “If the gentelmans’s plan was to make sure there was one less Republican in this world, he did!”
Englin took the floor next and apologized for interfering with Albo’s marital relations — and suggested he be more judicious with his remote.
Read earlier: McDonnell, Virginia Republicans back off mandatory invasive ultrasounds, 2/22/12