The Onion or the Washington Examiner? “Betty Crocker faces boycott for endorsing gay marriage.”

Elizabeth Warren or Donald Trump? “Got Rich Flipping Houses.”

Satire or media survey? “The centerpiece of [President Obama’s] agenda may get struck down, but MSM is focused on how that would hurt GOP & Romney.”

VP Joe Biden or Mitt Romney? “It’s A Depression For Millions And Millions Of Americans.”

Rep. Paul Ryan (R-Wis.) or Peter Orszag? “I think what we should be doing is a version of Domenici-Rivlin. … The thing that’s interesting about that is it has a massive, upfront, additional tax cut/stimulus combined with a lot of out-year deficit reduction. That is what we should be doing. … I think it’s the only viable path to getting something enacted.”

Sen. Scott Brown (R-Mass.) ducking out of the RNC convention or Sen. Claire McCaskill (D-Mo.) dodging Charlotte, N.C.? “You’ve got to say to people at home, which is more important? Going to a place with a bunch of party honchos and having cocktail parties or being at home talking to them? So this has never been a hard call for me. Everybody is trying to make this a big deal and narrative.”

Closer to zero or 31? “What isn’t in much doubt is that a Republican majority of the House of Representatives will on Thursday vote to hold Attorney General Eric Holder in criminal contempt for failing to deliver documents to Congress — assuming he has still not coughed up the papers. What is as yet unknown is just how many Democrats vote along with the GOP. The pressure has been rising on 31 Democrats who a year ago joined a letter written by House Oversight Committee Chairman Darrell Issa to President Barack Obama, asking him to direct Mr. Holder and the Justice Department to work with the congressional investigation into Fast and Furious, the botched gun-walking operation.”

1938 or 2012? “Basically, the [German] court held that a) all children have a right to physical ‘integrity’ b) male circumcision is a permanent and consequential change to the anatomy c) neither the parents’ freedom of religion nor their right to raise their children trumps the child’s right to decide the fate of his foreskin once he’s old enough to do so.” Read the whole thing.