Only President Obama could put the Jewish vote in play. “[Mitt Romney’s] visit to Jerusalem could be a turning point for the GOP. Why a tide of super-PAC funds and Obama’s shaky diplomatic relations might loosen Democrats’ grip on Jewish voters.”

Only Opening Ceremonies as bizarro as London’s could generate such responses, albeit tongue in cheek.

Only now do we hear this from Obama’s car czar. “Obama’s ex-semi-auto czar, Steve Rattner, goes off message and says he doesn’t ‘believe we can reverse’ the outsourcing of manufacturing jobs. Apparently it is not Mitt Romney’s fault. Rather, the wage gap is just too great. Using GM as an example, Rattner says the company’s Michigan workers make $55/hour, its Mexican workers make a little more than $7/hour — while in China it’s $4.50 an hour and in India $1/hour.”

Only a group of tough-minded lawmakers is really pushing for “crippling” sanctions. The White House? Not so much. “Republicans and Democrats are pressuring congressional negotiators to produce legislation imposing the severest penalties on Iran, targeting its energy sector and financial institutions as the United States seeks to weaken Tehran economically and derail its pursuit of nuclear weapons. With just one week before Congress’ August break, proponents of tough sanctions see this as their last, best chance for far-reaching, crippling penalties as recent high-level talks between world powers and Iran have failed to curb its uranium enrichment.”

Only Obama could make human rights activists pine for the “freedom agenda.” Josh Rogin: “The Mitt Romney campaign is about to open up a new front against President Barack Obama on foreign policy; he will ramp up his criticism of the administration’s record on democracy promotion and human rights. . . .

Only panic would explain resorting to another round of desperate ads to scare women. “President Obama is airing another television ad in swing states attacking Republican Mitt Romney’s position on abortion that repeats false claims from an earlier spot. What gives? A look at the dwindling gender gap in just one of the states where the ad is running gives it away. In Virginia — ground zero for the so-called ‘war on women’ because of anti-abortion initiatives in the state capitol — Obama was running ahead of Romney . . . largely because of monster leads among women. The gender gap was 13 points in March and 16 points in June. Then came July’s survey, which found the candidates deadlocked at 44 percent each. The gender gap had shrunk to only 5 points.”

Only more of the same from Obama in a second term, says the latest RNC ad.

Only Jake Tapper can expose the White House’s mendacity this completely.

Only having fun on a Friday afternoon.