The late Leo Durocher once said, "Baseball is like church. Many attend, few understand." I, my friends, am one pious man when it comes to America's favorite pastime, and today is Opening Day. That sound you hear? The singing angels flying around my head.

Neighborhoods surrounding Ledroit Park and Shaw. (Marvin Joseph/WASHINGTON POST)

What would you do if you thought you had a multimillion-dollar winning lotto ticket? Would you tell The New York Post that you hid it inside of the McDonald's where you are employed? Would you lawyer up and tell your co-workers that you, in fact, bought the winning numbers with some side money and not the big pool you all put together? Would you hold press conferences telling the media to leave you alone, even though you just asked them all to come see you? No? You, then, are not Mirlande Wilson.

Sexual abuse of young boys is growing practice in Afghanistan , according to human rights officials. The society of older men who groom children for sexual relationships has been an open secret in the mountainous, desert nation and has been on the rise in post-Taliban Afghanistan. These kids are known as "bacha bazi" and their trafficking and exploitation as "dancing boys" unfortunately goes unpunished because there are no reliable statistics on it. Ernesto Londoño details this disheartening cycle of rape and coercion.

There was a time when Instagram was an iPhone users fun side toy . When the old-school style photos first started showing up on social networks, they were a cool alternative to the norm. Once everyone figured out it was an app, everyone started using it. And now that it's now available for Android, everyone and their mom is using it. The Style Blog's Maura Judkis offers a quick primer for those of you just now getting on the square photo bandwagon.

Tonight, I will put my personal health in the hands of a bunch of guys wearing ice skates . The Capitals take on the Florida Panthers in the last home game of the season, and still have an outside shot at a division title. To put it plainly, if the Capitals win their final two games, they're in the playoffs. But that would just be too easy, wouldn't it? The Post's Katie Carrera previews tonight's sure heartstopper and breaks down the postseason scenarios should the Caps falter.

Extra Bites

• Good news, oenophiles! If you eat in Maryland, you can now bring your own hooch in to restaurants. I probably don't need to tell you this is already legal in D.C. and Virginia, for a small corking fee, of course.

• The three funniest people on "Saturday Night Live" are rumored to all be leaving the show. This happens every three to four years, but it's still kind of a bummer.

• This is a video of a woman making a rainbow with a shotgun. You're welcome.

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