Tom Hanks won the hearts of the nation -- and an Oscar as Best Actor -- in Forrest Gump. (PHIL CARUSO, PARAMOUNT PICTURES/ABC)

I love the Twitterbox . It's pretty much one of the most fun things I get to play with everyday and it's available to everyone. And for one high school assistant principal in Prince George's County, it's his moneymaker, so to speak.William Blake, who is in his first year as an administrator, has embraced the social networking site as a way to communicate with his school community. Unfortunately, the site is also the source of many of Henry A. Wise Jr. High School's beefs. The Post's Robert Samuels reports.

Remember that guy who was apparently slashing butts in malls across Virginia? Apparently, he's skipped town in a major way. The man who was bizarrely terrorizing young women with a box cutter is now back in his native country of Peru, according to authorities. The guy used to live in Fairfax and if you're keeping count, police say he victimized nine women over six months. The Post's Justin Jouvenal reports on the effort to find suspect Johnny D. Guillen Pimentel.

I have respect for Kwanzaa , but my days of celebrating it are over. The holiday that was invented by a teacher in California is dwindling in popularity, but that doesn't mean that some people aren't still taking it seriously. In Southeast, the Union Temple Baptist Church observes the 45-year-old tradition, complete with African garb and "prosperity gospel." The Post's Hamil R. Harris reports on how the holiday with roots in black nationalism is staying alive in Anacostia.

The Muslims are coming! If this is a problem for you, stop reading now. The comedy tour featuring four comics who practice Islam is literally taking over the nation, one joke at a time. And the whole operation is the basis for a documentary film about Islamophobia in this country. I can't tell you how much I love this show. The Post's Tara Bahrampour reports on the newest movement of Muslim-American stand-up comedy.

Sports recap time, kids . The Wizards are still terrible, the Capitals managed to get a nice win last night and the Georgetown Hoyas popped Louisville last night to open their Big East schedule. More specifically, after calling out the media and his fans, Andray Blatche went 2-13 from the floor in their 18-point loss. Also, Tomas Vokoun had a monster night in the net at the Verizon Center. But to be clear, The Hoyas are The Truth. I'll say it now, this team will be playing well after Saint Patrick's Day next year.

Extra Bites

• My second biggest local story of the year is: the earthquake. For about 45 terrifying seconds, people were screaming in our newsroom and running out of the building. Next thing we knew, the cathedral was a mess and people were rappelling off the obelisk.

• Dave McKenna is my favorite sportswriter of all time not named Tony Kornheiser or Michael Wilbon. He's now gone from City Paper. This is his last column.

• Dave Chappelle is still super diesel. I've got the pictures to prove it.

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