The Washington Post

Baby Come Back

Well the liberals may have the better economic argument, but you can be sure the conservatives have their moral arguments straight. Take the babies issue, for example. Every life is precious because it is a potential worker!

Is that an unfair way to characterize the conservative opinion about babies? You be the judge. I won’t try to oversimplify the argument, except yes I will: “Other people should have babies so we have lots of worker bees. If we don’t make enough worker bees, who will support us when we are old and selfish? The choice of not making baby workers is some kind of decadence.” What is wrong with this argument? You mean besides EVERYTHING?

This idea to view childbearing in such utilitarian terms is not what you expect from a morality-based value system, but here it is, as naked as a newborn. But even at that, it has the cost/benefit equation backwards. The expanding population of the planet is still ‘hard at work’ at its familiar pattern of Wrecking the Place. This time it’s the climate. Drill, baby drill. Burn, baby burn. Hey Ross! You forgot to mention climate! Last I checked, which was today, we were filling our skies with carbon dioxide, over-filling our oceans with acidified water, and mowing down our carbon-storing forests to fill the needs of your ponzi scheme of ever-more workers. Still more of them just might have some additional negative impact there! Or maybe you forgot on purpose. Who knows. The important consideration of families is more workers. You should grow a mustache to twirl as you explain this to us. Waxed mustaches could be a conservative moral value too! Yes, more workers, right at the exact cusp of the ROBOT revolution that will give human workers exactly nothing to do.

Lazy thinking. Decadent, I say!

Tom Toles is the editorial cartoonist for The Post and writes the Tom Toles blog. See all of his cartoons here.


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