A wardrobe advisory sent by CBS to Grammy attendees this week had members of the press screaming for joy.
It’s not often they get to talk about “bare fleshy under curves of the buttocks” and “bare sides or under curvature of the breasts” under the guise of “breaking news.”
But that, and lots more where that came from, is included in the network’s “Wardrobe Advisory” first leaked to Web site Deadline.com by a snippy source who complained, “I assume that my lovely colleagues do not get this same email for the Oscars.”
Well, of course not, Pookie. But when was the last time you saw Helen Mirren in a bedazzled turquoise thong-onsie with Imelda Marcos sleeves and Tinkerbell wings, like Lady Gaga wore to perform at the 2010 Grammys — or Meryl Streep in a purple pastie, like the one Lil’ Kim wore to the 1999 VMA’s?
But if you’re worried that CBS’s memo is going to wreck your Grammy-viewing fun on Sunday, rest easy.
CBS says that it sent the same fashion-guidance memo last year before it broadcast the live music-industry trophy show.
And last year at the Grammys — when not mourning the previously night’s death of Whitney Houston — Fergie was posing in black bra and briefs under a bright orange see-through lace Jean Paul Gaultier gown. Which apparently got a thumbs-up from the CBS Grammy Decency Police.
That said, there’s no doubt that the press will critique this year’s Grammys outfits against CBS’s leaked dress-code memo, in which “thong type costumes are problematic,” and “foreign language on wardrobe will need to be cleared.”
But take away their thongs, their under curvature of female body parts and their foreign language, and musicians will still finds ways to express themselves sartorially. At last year’s Grammys, for instance, Nicki Minaj made headlines wearing the latest in Red-Riding-Hood-visits-Vatican.