(Click here to skip down to the winning crossword clues)
AEEGLLZ > ALL-ZEE: A successful naptime at day care.
AEEGLLZ > LAZE-LEG: What the potato puts on the couch.
AEEGLLZ > ZEAL-GEL: Lube.
Seven letters, six times for our neologism contest based on the syndicated ScrabbleGrams feature that appears daily in The Post: At the bottom of this page is a list of 45 seven letter sets taken from the 2005 “Big Book of ScrabbleGrams.” Each of them contains at least one real seven-letter word, but that doesn’t matter here. This week: Create a five-, six- or seven-letter word (or phrase) by scrambling the letters of any of the sets and define it, as in the examples above from one of this week’s sets.
Just as in the crossword clue results that run today, many people will inevitably come up with highly similar entries; one way to make your definition more inkworthy than some other Loser’s is to include a funny example of how your word could be used in real life. (Note: We are not playing for Scrabble points; the letter values don’t matter.)
Important! How to format your entry: Begin each entry — as usual, up to 25 in all — with the letter set you’re unscrambling, as above, and spell it as printed, so that it won’t take hours for the Empress just to sort the entries. Don’t number your entries, because then they won’t start with the seven letters, right?
Submit entries at wapo.st/enter-invite-1319 (all lowercase).
Winner gets the Lose Cannon, our Style Invitational trophy. Second place receives a Mason jar of Auntie’s Black Pepper Everybody’s Shito (“More Shito Less Oil”), a deep red Ghanaian sauce including tomato paste, herring and the eponymous pepper. If you win this, you have to let the Empress have a taste. Donated by Marleen May.
Other runners-up win our “You Gotta Play to Lose” Loser Mug or our “Whole Fools” Grossery Bag. Honorable mentions get one of our lusted-after Loser magnets, “We’ve Seen Better” or “IDiot Card.” First Offenders receive only a smelly tree-shaped air “freshener” (FirStink for their first ink). Deadline is Monday night, Feb. 25; results published March 17 (online Thursday, March 14. See general contest rules and guidelines at wapo.st/InvRules. The headline “Gridiculous” was submitted by both Kevin Dopart and Jesse Frankovich; Chris Doyle wrote the honorable-mentions subhead. Join the Style Invitational Devotees on Facebook at on.fb.me/invdev. “Like” Style Invitational Ink of the Day on Facebook at bit.ly/inkofday; follow @StyleInvite on Twitter.
The Style Conversational The Empress's weekly online column discusses each new contest and set of results. Especially if you plan to enter, check it out at wapo.st/styleconv.
GRIDICULOUS! THE CROSSWORD CLUES OF WEEK 1315
In Week 1315, our annual Clue Us In contest, we asked you to come up with clever clues for any of the words in the grid shown below. Some of the inking clues require thinking outside the box, as it were; for example, read EARPLUGS as “Earp lugs,” STAT as S-tat.
HEADHONCHO: Restroom attendant (Rob Cohen, Potomac, Md.; Kevin Dopart, Washington)
REAP: “As ye sue, so shall ye __”: Motto of personal-injury lawyers (Barbara Turner, Takoma Park, Md.)
and the book of outrageous tattoos:
LASTLAUGH: What Louis C.K. has already heard. (Ira Allen, Bethesda, Md.)
ANTHEM: How Daffy Duck describes George Clooney (Mark Calandra, Wenham, Mass.)
ADE: what to make if life gives you lemons, poms, brigs, stock, or Gators (Neal Starkman, Seattle)
ANTHEM: What you have if insects cling to the bottom of your dress (Duncan Stevens, Vienna, Va.)
ARCSIN: It was swept under the rug during Joan’s canonization. (David Ballard, Reston, Va.)
ARCTICCHAR: What’s gonna happen if they don’t rake that tundra. (Steve Baldwin, Bethesda, Md.)
AVOID: First step in a colonoscopy (B. Do it again) (Mark Calandra)
AVOID: The soft spot in Wilbur Ross’s heart (Ivars Kuskevics, Takoma Park, Md.)
BASKS: Gets a tan in Bilbao (Dudley Thompson, Cary, N.C.)
BOURDAIN: He took a one-way trip to Parts Unknown (Dinah Rokach, Silver Spring, Md.)
BRAS: They hold huddled masses yearning to breathe free (Barbara Turner)
BUD: Brett Kavanaugh’s old pal (Duncan Stevens)
BUD: State flower of Colorado (John Hutchins, Silver Spring, Md.)
CLAY: What a hooker provides for a C-note.(Michael Burch, Nashville)
DICEY: View out the front windshield of many a Ford Fairlane (Paul Burnham, Gainesville, Va.)
EARPLUGS: Melania’s must-have accessory (Jeff Hazle, San Antonio)
EARPLUGS: Fastest way to grow ear hair (John McCooey, Rehoboth Beach, Del.)
EARPLUGS: How Wyatt transports the bodies after a gunfight (Duncan Stevens)
ERRS: What the president puts on when he tweets (Lawrence McGuire, Waldorf, Md.)
FEY: Spirit “SNL” is now lacking (Rob Huffman, Fredericksburg, Va.)
GOBUST: When the stock market tanks, who ya gonna call? ____-ers. (J. Larry Schott, West Plains, Mo.)
GOBUST: “Basic Economics,” Chapter 11 (Theresa Rice, Bladensburg, Md., a First Offender)
GOBUST: Plastic surgeon’s license plate (Dan Steinbrocker, Los Angeles)
GOBUST: When they won’t give you the money for a whole statue (Kevin Meade, White Plains, N.Y., a First Offender)
HARE: Maybe he’d have won the race if he’d taken rabbit transit (Hildy Zampella, Alexandria, Va.)
HARE: Overconfident favorite starting with H who unexpectedly lost to reptile starting with T (Jesse Frankovich, Grand Ledge, Mich.)
ISH: Time when my spouse usually arrives (Jeff Hazle)
ISH: How Rudy Giuliani will walk back his statement “I never said his actions were treasonOUS . . .” (Frank Osen, Pasadena, Calif.)
ISH: What I do when you start talking in a movie theater, you boorish philistine! (2 words) (Todd DeLap, Fairfax, Va.)
LAM: Not even lame. (Gary Crockett, Chevy Chase, Md.)
LASIK: Surgery every NFL ref needs. — Saints fan (Will Stutzman, Millersburg, Ohio)
MESAS: How Bigfoot introduced himself to Tarzan (Hildy Zampella)
NOSHES: A big bowl of bagels and knishes — and how you feel after eating them (Steve Fahey, Olney, Md.)
NOSHES: What’s in a man cave? (1 word and 2 words) (Beverley Sharp, Montgomery, Ala.)
ONRAMP: A driving instructor’s place of prayer (Will Stutzman)
OSHA: acronym for Oh, Stop Having Accidents (Neal Starkman)
PLANE: The best way to travel coast to coast these days after train, clown car, unicycle and Plan D, canoe. (Ellen Ryan, Rockville, Md.)
PRO: The most accomplished crastinator (Beverley Sharp)
PRO: Prefix with -ctologist (Jon Ketzner, Cumberland, Md.)
RAITT: Hairy cousin in charge of the dorm (2 words) (Jeff Shirley, Richmond,Va.; Hildy Zampella)
RIBS: Elbow locator for Metro riders (Jeff Hazle)
RIBS: Eat a lot of these and you won’t see your own (Nancy Della Rovere, Silver Spring, Md.)
RIBS + TETONS: Things found in racks (Jeff Contompasis, Ashburn, Va.)
SENT: A sentence fragment (Jonathan Jensen, Baltimore)
SENT: Box where you never want to see drunk notes to your boss (Hildy Zampella)
SHRED: How to turn wheat into inedible breakfast cereal (Frank Osen)
SHRED: More than the amount of dignity shown by Mitch McConnell (Neal Starkman)
SIRI: According to the POTUS, the best thing ever to come out of Siria (Ivars Kuskevics)
STAT: Ink on Clark Kent’s chest (Chris Doyle, Denton, Tex.)
STORMS: How Trump often goes out of a meeting (Steve Fahey)
TAI CHI: What makes it look like you’re wrestling a giant slug (Barbara Turner)
TETONS: Peak-a-boobs (Dudley Thompson)
TETONS: The French royals still in line at 5 p.m. when the guillotine crew goes home (Allan Zackowitz, Brookeville, Md.)
THEE: How a Brit’s judgement differs from an American’s judgment (John McCooey)
YES: Double answer to “Are there any lousy groups in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame?” (Jon Ketzner)
YES: What come before “Oldes” and “Shoppes” (Todd DeLap)
YES: The kind of man Trump considers an ideal adviser (Drew Bennett, West Plains, Mo.)
YOUBETCHA:Was McCain sorry he picked Palin? (Kevin Meade)
And Last: YES: Will this entry get ink? (David Peckarsky, Tucson)
Still running — deadline Monday night, Feb. 18: our anagram contest. See wapo.st/invite1318.
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The letter sets to use in Style Invitational Week 1319: