Ah yes, a trademark, because OSU is 100% the only U.S. university with ‘the’ before its name ...

@MKingJohnson, tweeting about Ohio State’s Aug. 8 filing to trademark “THE,” so it can use the word on T-shirts and hats. The college is colloquially known as “THE Ohio State University,” with athletes and other alumni emphasizing the article. However, many U.S. universities are prefaced with the word “the.”

“I’M OFF THE DEEP END, WATCH AS I DIVE IN, I’LL NEVER MEET THE GROUND”

@AlpineGrok, joking about Whooshh Innovations’ “salmon cannon,” a translucent tube that propels fish over dams that block their migration paths. Video of a man placing a fish in the tube, and subsequent footage of the fish’s shadow traveling through the tube, went viral last week. The salmon cannon has been around since 2014, and reduces the fish’s migration — which can take days — to seconds.

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If you thought the Cuccinelli Crisis couldn’t get any worse, do I have some news for you.

@juliaioffe, blasting Ken Cuccinelli, acting director of U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Services, for comments he made Tuesday night about the Statue of Liberty’s famous poem by Emma Lazarus. Asked by CNN’s Erin Burnett to clarify earlier remarks he made to NPR that the poem should apply to migrants “who can stand on their own two feet,” Cuccinelli said the 1883 sonnet was “referring back to people coming from Europe.” Outraged Twitter users noted Lazarus also wrote, “From her beacon-hand, glows world-wide welcome.”

Honest question: Does Dave Portnoy know Twitter is public?

@Voodoo_Pork, criticizing Barstool Sports founder Dave Portnoy for a Tuesday tweet that he would fire “on the spot” employees who spoke to journalist Rafi Letzter about the unionization process. Portnoy’s statement, and subsequent threats to “crush” any union, caught the AFL-CIO’s attention, as the group tweeted he was directly violating 1935’s National Labor Rights Act.

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