[Another dispatch from Arion Berger from her perch at the Cannes Film Festival]

WELL-MADE” is the faint praise of the festival. The undismissably quality films — earnest, lugubrious fare that slowly kills the soul and butt-muscles over a stupefying two hours-plus — is invariably described as “well-made,” which means the camera’s always in the right place even as your mind wanders, and the glacial pace has some psychological scores to settle. (Mostly about technology or how “we’re all connected,” something I fervently hope is not true.) Everything, actually, is well-made here — it’s Cannes. Not always interesting, but always well made. You know what’s also well-made? The variety of fine coffee drinks available for free in the press room — where the computers are, and the balcony — and “Le Club” for the press, which is lovely, with fresh bougainvilleas dropping fuchsia blooms on the green carpet.Photo by Francois Gulliot/AFP/Getty ImagesNo high-end journalists ever go in there. Probably because you can’t smoke.

The Kaurismaki” comes and goes in a blur of ennui and cool Finnish textures. It’s a shame that Aki Kaurismaki, at right — a director with such a keen sense of composition and how to photograph actors’ faces and the glacial, Northern locales — hasn’t had a new idea in 20 years. (And he’s lost his sense of humor, which must have been packed into his bag for the “Leningrad Cowboys Go America” tour and dropped into the Atlantic.)

The Lights in the Dusk” is one of the director’s paeans to the little guy, in this case a security guard who is serially scorned, shunned, conned, seduced, jailed and finally destroyed by his innocence. The level of maudlin pointlessness of this affair can be summed up by the fact that he invokes Charlie Chaplin‘s Little Tramp character in the press notes. No one with less to say makes prettier movies, and they aren’t venal in any way — I always root for the guy, and it’s heartbreaking.

Courtesy Friland A/SSpeaking of well-made things, Stefan Faldbakken‘s “URO” is like a two-hour Fox pilot for a really keen crime drama series — set in Norway‘s drug-infiltration unit — that you’ll tune into religiously for about three episodes and then drift away from. It has me for about an hour, then threatens to develop “dimensions.” Bah! Here’s what’s important about “URO,” pictured here. The hero looks like Brad Pitt and The Woman who comes back from his past to mess with him switches among blonde, brunette and red-haired wigs. You see?

Another afternoon in the computer room, drinking fine coffee and waiting for a free keyboard. Every day the nice ladies announced that there’s a very long wait and write my name down on the second page of their lists. This actually means that the wait can be anywhere from 20 minutes to an hour-plus, depending on the diligence of journalists beavering away before you. I am used to being on the second page — after all, I’m a bleu.

Off to something called “Suburban Mayhem” — wonder what that will be about? Damn elliptical Europeans.

Photo of Kaurismaki by Francois Gulliot/AFP/Getty Images; image from “URO” courtesy Friland A/S