It’s Halloween night and you’re stranded without a costume. The horror! Rather than staying home and dishing out Kit Kats in shame or — worse — going as a default sexy fill-in-the-blank/overplayed political figure, consult our guide to a dozen last-minute ensembles that you can whip up from common household items. These no-sew, few-to-no-dollars-needed options each take less than 10 minutes to put together and guarantee big laughs, if not a few head scratches. If nothing else, they’ll get a conversation going and might even spark some new friendships. Do we smell a group costume for next year?

The Pun

Best for: Witty wordsmiths
Our Pick: Caesar Salad
Wrap yourself in a white sheet, toga-style. (Finally, your college education comes in handy.) Using a hot-glue gun, adhere lettuce leaves (romaine works best) and croutons all over it. Point a bottle of Caesar salad dressing at everyone while crying “Et tu!”

Other Ideas
›› Tickled Pink: Dress in all pink and carry around a feather
›› Capitol Hill-Billy: Wear a Polo shirt and cowboy boots and chew on hay
›› Ceiling Fan: Wear a jersey and chant “Go Ceilings!” all night

Avoid This
Cereal Killer is quite clever (stab an empty box of Lucky Charms all night), but something tells us carrying a knife at a party is a bad idea.

The Meme

Best for: Social-media savants
Our Pick
: Photo-Bombing Stingray
This slimy guy caused a cyber-stir when he sneak-attacked three unsuspecting women posing for a pic. (Google it.) To re-create the incident, cut both sides of a grey pillowcase to form a long strip of fabric. Split the middle seam to make a hole for your face. Wear sneakers so you can dash around and ruin revelers’ photos.

Other Ideas
›› Ermahgerd Girl: Put your hair in pigtails and carry three books (preferably “Goosebumps” titles)
›› Texts from Hillary: Wear sunglasses and stare at your phone all night
›› McKayla Maroney: Don a scrunchie, medal and grimace

Avoid This
Step away from the bow tie and blazer. One PSY is more than enough.

The Election

Best for: Election enthusiasts
Our Pick: Popular Vote
Channel your inner Cher from “Clueless” and wear head-to-toe designer clothing and accessories. Pin “Vote” buttons all over (we made our own oversized versions using Sharpies) and be preoccupied with your phone all night. When people ask what you are, roll your eyes and remind them to vote Nov. 6.

Other Ideas
›› Electoral Collage: Wear a plain tee or sweatshirt and pin a menagerie of political figures all over
›› Undecided Voter: Wear an equal mix of red and blue and constantly shrug your shoulders
›› Clint Eastwood: Talk to empty chairs all night

Avoid This
The Binders Full of Women flub is overplayed (and sounds uncomfortable). Same goes for Unemployed Big Bird and Pumping Iron Paul Ryan.