For reasons that would be very familiar to approximately 50 million voting-age Americans, I woke up Wednesday morning feeling very depressed about the current state of affairs and recent events. Can you please recommend some shoes to cheer me up? — Ann

The Manolo, who finds politics generally distasteful, must confess that he woke up Wednesday morning feeling nothing but relief that the aggressive, importuning, hectoring and round-the-clock campaigning for the public office had ended … for now.

It is not that the Manolo is disdainful of the multitudinous benefits of democracy — such as sound-bite debates and “I approve this slander” ads — but rather that the Manolo cannot be satisfied by the two-party system.

Indeed, if the Manolo had to describe his political leanings, he would say he was the Shoetarian Monarchist. He longs for the divine-right king who looks good in the ermine robe, silk tights, stacked heels and shoulder-length peruke.

Oddly, either of this season’s candidates would have made excellent constitutional monarchs. Both are distinguished men who look good in tailored suits. Either would be perfectly suited for duties of modern kingship, cutting ribbons at the supermarket openings and waving stiffly from balconies.

Look! Here is the Gladia Artistic cutout sandal from the Oscar de la Renta, ($895, the magnificent, shiny object that will distract you from your gloom.