Harper, a U.S. Park Police horse, shows others how to woo the fillies. TIM SLOAN / AFP Harper, a U.S. Park Police horse, shows others how to woo the fillies. TIM SLOAN / AFP

HAY, GIRL, HAY

He Gave One a 14-Carrot Ring

His oats were farm-raised and not wild, but that didn’t stop one horse from attempting to sow them … five times. According to The Washington Post, a stallion in Montgomery County, Md., escaped his enclosure to mate with five mares on another property. Police cited the horse’s owner last month in connection with the animal’s unwanted contact and for allegedly having a stray horse. Stray? Pfft. That horse knew exactly where he was.

EXTRA JOLLY

Santa’s Christmas Eve Snack Expectations Tick Up a Notch

Leave the cookies and milk for the kids; cookies and beer are a more suitable treat for the 21-and-over set. That’s what Full Tilt Brewing is banking on. On Nov. 15, the Baltimore-based beermaker released its Berger Cookie Chocolate Stout, made with 30 pounds of Berger cookie wafers and 300 pounds of fudge per 2,378-gallon batch. Warning: Don’t let this be your kid’s first taste of beer.

LINT DEPOSITS

Not Belly Button, Thank God

There was a small dustup in Vienna last month after a dryer repairman allegedly left a black bag of dryer lint on a customer’s doorstep, according to a police report. The victim reported the incident after getting into an argument with the repairman over the quality of the job. The customer decided not to pursue criminal charges, but the static electricity charges were unavoidable.