Today, the internet brought us the news of a belated Festivus miracle and taught us that the National Zoo’s red pandas are actually just like your 30-something (former) city friends, among other bloggy goodness.

“Moved to Virginia to have babies, just like all my other 30-something DC friends.” — An anonymous commenter at laments the relocation of red pandas Rusty and Shama from the National Zoo to its Conservation Biology Institute in Front Royal, Va. The zoo speculates that the throngs of people visiting Bao Bao may have “compromised” the pair’s ability to breed — and give D.C. a new baby panda cub to obsess over.

“News outlets, Twitter, your Facebook feed — all have been infected by the awful Superbowl. … But it shouldn’t be done, and not just because it looks ugly and gives copy editors such as myself visions of cereal bowls wearing capes.” — Alicia Kennedy at excoriates regular people and headline writers alike for smashing the two-word Super Bowl into one.

“The doughscuit is more humble. It’s got a hardworking biscuit for a dad, not a fancy croissant. It doesn’t have the little ® next to its name.” — Ian Chillag at introduces readers to the cronut’s less ostentatious offshoot. The doughscuit — a doughnut/biscuit hybrid — may have a much more unwieldy name but Chillag deems it “transcendent.” He tasted the treat at Chicago’s Donut Fest. “Every last nook of free space in my body was full, and I bought extras,” he wrote.

“Can I suggest The Real World: Rhodes Scholar Edition, MTV?” — Willa Paskin, the TV critic at, argues that the 29th season of MTV’s flagship reality show has hit a “new, depressing low” and jokingly suggested an even more contrived — if less raunchy — direction. She writes: “The Real World, formerly as pure as a glass of water full of cigarette butts, rum, sunscreen, and bodily fluids — now just a glass of all of those things, without water.”

“I’m clutching my man-ssiere with excitement!” — Commenter Justin Case at reacts to the news that a secret “Seinfeld” project is in the works, reviving Case’s nostalgia for Frank Costanza’s man bra. Jerry Seinfeld confirmed Thursday that he and other cast members are working on a one-off project that will be released “very, very soon.” Seinfeld didn’t give many details, but did say that it won’t be a Super Bowl (note proper spelling) ad.