This morning, Patrick Omberg, 9, was sworn in as “Chief for the Day” by the Arlington County Police Department, his reward for writing the winning essay about what it means to be a police officer. We asked the future fourth grader how he plans to crack down on Arlington criminals. S.D.
What are some of the crime problems facing Arlington today?
Kidnapping, robberies, shootings, stealing, punching, controlling traffic.
If you could hire anyone to help you fight crime, who would it be?
He shoots webs.
What do you think of the recent Arlington County Board vote on bar hopping?
What’s bar hopping?
Bar hopping is when you get a drink from a bar, and then go to the next bar to the next bar …
They should stay where they got their first drink from.
Do you think your dogs would make good police dogs?
No. They are really old and blind.
When you’re police chief, who will you arrest?
I would arrest my sister and send her away because she’s annoying.
What kind of police car would you like to have?
A horse that’s the size of a dog. The smallest horse in the world.
Why such a small horse?
Because it could head butt [the criminals] and step on their foots.
And pin them down so you could arrest them?
Actually it would be so painful, their foot would be broken, like a car running it over.
What kind of prison would you put your sister in?
[It would have] an outer layer of diamond bars.
A person who enjoys watching the activity along a canal. The Georgetown BID invoked the early-20th-century term to name its latest beautification project: a series of murals, inspired by the C&O Canal, that will adorn the shuttered Latham Hotel (3000 M St. NW) until Jan. 5. Now go forth and gongoozle yourself some art. R.S.
Sometimes a candle is just a candle?
The Potter’s House in Adams Morgan may soon lose its signature psychedelic candle mural, “The Light of the World.” The coffee house/bookstore/event space is undergoing renovations after changing hands from one church group to another in 2013. The new owners plan to paint over the work, fearing that its religious overtone will scare off secular patrons, WAMU reported. The artist, Karla Rodas-Israel, plans to fight its destruction, noting that the candle isn’t religious: “The light is universal.” R.S.
Two Truths and a Lie
I’m a taxi! Now can I see that ATM card?
For 31/2 years, Nyerere Mitchell rode around D.C.’s nightlife hotspots hunting for drunk people. The 50-year-old pleaded guilty Monday to convincing more than 60 of them to hop into his “taxi” (a silver Range Rover SUV), taking them to an ATM and withdrawing the “fare” for them. He raked in more than $200,000. The story gets even more ridiculous. Can you guess the fake fact? R.S.
1. Mitchell often posed as a woman, replete with a wig and padded bra.
2. He would keep his victim’s card, returning a similar-looking one stolen from someone else.
3. He told some of the victims not to worry about the ATM fee — he’d take it off their fare.
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