Dear Miss Manners: We have a household member who has very bad manners. He lies around on the couch all day, expects us to provide all his meals and has never even offered to help with the dishes.

He also has atrocious hygiene habits, resulting in horrible breath. He tracks in dirt and leaves from the yard. We don't even try to plant flowers or grow a garden because he ruins any landscaping he sees.

Sometimes, when I am ready to turn in for the night, I will find him asleep in my bed! I will have to actually wake him up and ask him to get out of my bed so I can go to sleep. Worst of all, he regularly wakes up my husband in the middle of the night just to announce that he needs to use the restroom. This happens almost every night!

We love him very much, but we just don't know how to address these issues. I swear, if he pees on another bush during a family walk, I just might lose it.

Does he happen to be your pet? Or your son? He doesn’t sound all that lovable to Miss Manners, but then, she is not his parent.

Your choices are:

1. Engage in some overdue training.

2. Lose it.

You will notice that the former would have the least serious consequences.

Dear Miss Manners: My husband's sister became a first-time grandmother when her son and his wife welcomed their first child. The new mom and dad created an online photo album, sent out invitations to everyone to join and view it, and they add many baby photos daily.

Many relatives signed up for the album, but they are now all complaining about the many emails, arriving multiple times during the day, saying that new photos have been uploaded. Anticipating all these email notices, I never signed up. Now my sister-in-law is wondering why I have not joined the photo album group.

Yes, a new grandchild is wonderful, but not when the whole family is bombarded with photos ad nauseam.

The family wants to know: Is there a tactful way to inform my sister-in-law that most relatives have no interest in this? Or do we all suffer and wait it out for the new parents to slack off with the photo-taking, like most parents eventually do?

Come, now. You would not really become nauseated by looking at pictures of a new baby relative. And you don’t even have to look at them. Miss Manners presumes that you have a delete key.

There are times — engagements, as well as births — when a fond family indulges such foolishness, knowing that it won’t last.

You could sort all those emails into a file, telling yourself — and, if necessary, the proud parents — that you want to examine them at leisure. That time might even come, as an alternative to playing solitaire.

New Miss Manners columns are posted Monday through Saturday on washingtonpost.com/advice. You can send questions to Miss Manners at her website, missmanners.com. You can also follow her @RealMissManners.

2021, by Judith Martin