Who would suggest looking for a ring if he was not yet ready to get married? His response was that I misunderstood him, that he wants to get married but doesn't think we are quite there yet.
Am I overreacting? I never dreamed anyone would suggest ring-buying if they weren't actually ready to get married. Any advice? I don't know whether I should continue this for another month and hope he's more clear with his feelings and ready to commit, or bail.
— Should I Stay or Should I Go?
Should I Stay or Should I Go?: This is all talk of logistics — and of a very small logistical window at that, since, what exactly will this magical month reveal?
More important, though: What about the feelings? The life plans, and the emotional honesty behind them?
What do you actually think of each other, feel for each other, need from each other, see in your future with each other, believe of each other?
Why is it up to him to propose? He decides, you merely consent? What’s with letting someone else run your life like that? Seriously — it withstands roughly zero scrutiny, that tradition.
Rings, like any symbol, can be lovely. But it’ll come to be a symbol of how mindlessly you two walked into marriage (or walked away from it) if you don’t start talking honestly and intimately, stat.
Dear Carolyn: Soooo after five years of joking that I thought my 65-year-old mother was having an affair, I've confirmed through some snooping that she actually is. After a week of mulling this over, I still really don't care about her [messing around] after my dad's prostate cancer most likely left him unable, but I do deeply care about my dad finding out. I can't see him doing too much digging, but I'm concerned that my mom will get more comfortable with this as time goes on and will screw it up somehow.
We are not people who talk about things. The running joke is that as a kid, we didn't discuss what happened below the waist and above the knees. So I have no idea how to tell my mom to make sure she keeps this on the uber-DL. I'm at their house now while they're on vacation and considered leaving a fairly cryptic but obvious note in her journal. What am I supposed to do with this potentially earth shattering information?
Concerned: Stay out of their marriage, and get out of their stuff.
Hi, Carolyn: Any light, quippy suggestions for when I'm spending time with someone who's on their phone a lot?
— All. The. Phone Time.
All. The. Phone Time.: My favorite is, “Would you please put your phone away? Thank you. And not just face down — away.”
Re: Phone: "Would you please put your phone away? Thank you." Sent as a text message, of course.
— Light and Quippy
Light and Quippy: Touche.