The Washington PostDemocracy Dies in Darkness

Lulu the dog flunked out of CIA bomb-sniffer school because she just didn’t care

Terrorists might be heading to American airports with explosives-packed suitcases right now. Violent extremists could be fashioning pipe bombs in their basements. Thousands of U.S. security officials spend their days and nights preoccupied with detecting and preventing such threats.

But you know who doesn’t care? Lulu the black Lab doesn’t care.

Until recently, the young pup was training to be an explosive detection K-9 for the CIA. It’s an important and noble job, one the agency refers to as no less than “the first line of defense against explosive threats to agency personnel and buildings at Headquarters and abroad.”

But Lulu, the CIA announced Wednesday in a series of tweets, was really not into it.

Can’t we all relate? Sure, Lulu’s assignment was a matter of life and death. But becoming a canine Carrie Mathison involved more mundane study, like peering into metal canisters and exploring concrete blocks.

Training also involved extra treats, pats and fun, the agency noted, because sometimes even aspiring hero dogs need additional motivation.

Still, Lulu seemed to know she wasn’t living her best life. The agency, to its credit, honored her wish to be true to herself.

Perhaps she knew something the other puppies in her class did not — that flunking out might bring its own rewards. Lulu, it appears, is now supporting the CIA from the soft, carpeted sidelines of a living room.

She’s still a very good dog.

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