It’s a hot August day. The pavement is shimmering like a mirage. The sun is roasting the interior of your car, where cookies could surely bake on the dashboard. The forecast is 97 degrees which speaks nothing of how muggy it is. The air is dripping with a dew point of 74. The heat index will peak at 105. This is the worst summer can throw at you.
You arrive at work, embarrassingly drenched in sweat. You ache for something to quench the thirst of a thousand deserts.
There’s nothing you want more right now than… a steaming cup of pumpkin spice latte.
That’s what Starbucks is banking on, at least. The fall favorite is available starting today, despite the oppressive weather. This is the earliest Starbucks has started offering the autumn drink, although it keeps getting earlier each year. In 2017, the PSL hit menus in early September. Even then it seemed too soon.
“Spending on specialty drinks like the annual Pumpkin Spice Latte are one way Starbucks stock hopes to recover from an otherwise downward trends this year,” Fortune magazine writes, noting that the chain announced in June it would close 150 locations. It also raised coffee prices this year.
Unfortunately for the PSL, the entire Eastern Seaboard is roasting in a late-summer heat wave this week and more than 50 million people were under some kind of heat advisory or warning on Tuesday in the Northeast. Another 10 million people are simmering under the same circumstances in the Midwest. This weather does not call for a latte.
Looking ahead, we can’t find any pumpkin spice-worthy weather in the near future. The rest of the week is going to be miserably hot and humid. A “cold front” Thursday night could knock temperatures back into the 80s but the forecast is summery through the end of next week — afternoon thunderstorms and all.
Peering even farther into the crystal ball, September is probably going to be warmer than normal. It’s possible fall won’t actually start until October, which — coincidentally — is when fall starts.
Until then, I’ll take my PSL ice-cold, please.