Bryce Harper appeared on “Jimmy Kimmel Live” last night, and it took the late night host five seconds to tell Harper he had some clown questions for him.

“Perfect,” Harper replied. “You must be from Toronto.”

Crushed it, bro.

All in all, it was a pretty tame interview. The season is still months away, Harper’s not selling anything or appearing on any video game covers. It was just a friendly chat between two dudes from Las Vegas. Harper appeared comfortable, managed to make a few jokes and be charming. Oh, and if you missed it and are keeping track at home, Harper’s faux hawk has graduated to full on Mohawk.

The chat was short and sweet, but here are a few excerpts.

On getting called up:
“I went into my coach’s office. It was snowing, which was kinda weird. I was in Syracuse. Pretty similar weather here. It’s freezing right now. I went in there and coach said ‘Hey, you got a shot to go up to L.A. and join the club up there.’ And I was really excited about that because it’s so close to home… and my family was there and it was just a great moment to be able to get there so easily. It was kinda surreal. I had a seven hour flight and all I could think of was ‘You better not look like an idiot.’”

On the fan who mooned the camera during his first major league hit:
“You kinda not try to think about that. It’s hard to worry about the fans as you’re facing [Chad] Billingsly. I wish that guy would have let me sign his butt or something. That’d be kinda cool.”

On his superstitions:
“I get to the field at 12:00 for a 7:05 game, and it starts from there. I shower seven times while I’m at the field and I don’t even need too. Yeah, it’s bad. As long as … I’m doing good or my team’s winning, I’m gonna keep doing the same thing. Wearing the same undershirt, I mean, I eat Eggo waffles. It has to be Eggo before the game. I mean, it’s really weird. PB and honey, I mean, I’m really superstitious.”

Eggo endorsement in 3…2…

If you were smart and went to bed at a decent hour, here’s what you missed.