Kevin Seraphin has tweeted many photos and videos of his pets, which include a snake and two iguanas. One of his favorites was his bird, April, but she quickly fell out of favor with the Wizards big man.

“Too much noise,” he said, shaking his head. “At the beginning she was cool. Then I had another one and they both was together. Then every morning, AH AH, AH AH.”

If you’re keeping track, that’s one bird, good. Two birds, bad.

Seraphin told me that the two feathered friends would wake him at dawn with their squawking.

“Every morning when they see the light,” he said, mimicking the noises they’d make. “You have to have something really dark [to cover their cage] to [make them] believe it’s night. They woke me up too early.”

Seraphin would leave his birds with a bird-sitter whenever he traveled, and he eventually decided to give them to her permanently and stick to quiet reptiles.

“She loves them,” he told me. “She wanted them so bad. So they’re okay. It’s a good home.”

So, note to future pets. If you want to make it in the Seraphin household, you’d best keep it quiet.