Z-Burger’s track record with these promotions is damning. Similar offers announced for the Nats and Redskins playoff appearances also had disastrous results. Three promotions, three playoff knockouts. Stop it, Z-Burger.
If you’re still bummed, here’s fake Adam Oates to make you feel better:
“There’s no reason to panic. Stanley Cups aren’t won at the beginning of the season,” he said. “They’re won at the end of the season — particularly in the playoffs. That’s unfortunate for us. If Stanley Cups were won in the middle of the regular season, this organization would have a lot of Stanley Cups.”