We already knew that Rob Gronkowski was the NFL’s foremost party-loving bro. After all, this is the guy who, years ago, gave the world the immortal phrase, “Yo soy fiesta.”
But, over the weekend, the New England Patriots tight end took things to another level, and by that I mean “international waters.” Gronk’s Party Ship (that was the official name) set sail Friday, and as of this writing, we can only hope it returns to Miami, with everyone still accounted for, sometime on Monday.
So what did we learn from this aquatic bacchanal? Let’s find out!
Even Gronk had to wait his turn in the security line
Stars — they’re just like us! The guess here is that he avoided the irritation of having to take his shoes off by simply not wearing any.
There were some oldsters and — much more disturbingly — youngsters aboard
People did the right thing and shopped for clothing at the boardwalk
There was a lot of drinking
But of course.
Performing artists included Flo Rida, Waka Flocka Flame and Redfoo
But not the other guy from LMFAO. Bummer.
Flo Rida partied with some of the oldsters
And taught them how to dab! Well done, Mr. Rida.
Gronk doesn’t lack for dance moves
Bill Belichick no doubt approves of his strenuous efforts to stay in shape.
The apple clearly didn’t stumble far from the tree
Papa Gronk was on board. On board with everything.
A couple got engaged
What more romantic spot to pop the question?
Gronk reportedly offered to pay for a live sex act
Oh, don’t pretend you’re shocked.
Gronk and his bros (i.e., his actual brothers) are not stupid
Just ask them!
They played “Family Feud”
And one of the correct answers was “Whoppie/Gronkin.” Because Gronkin.
It doesn’t stink to be Gronk
Let’s see … a legendary party animal whom everyone seems to like, despite the fact that he plays for the widely disliked Patriots, and who is on his way to becoming the greatest tight end in NFL history? Yeah, that’s not a bad way to be.