(AP Photo/David Zalubowski)

What are you up to, “SportsCenter” Twitter feed?

That vanity URL takes you to a Change.org petition asking that President Obama make the first Thursday and Friday of the NCAA tournament a national holiday.

“The opening weekend of March Madness cost American companies an estimated $1.9 BILLION in wages lost to distraction and unproductivity. More than 60 million Americans fill out brackets, and this petition is for those 60 million as well as the companies that employ them. Let us be rid of the Boss Button, let us create no more fake spreadsheets, and let us watch March Madness the way God intended: On a couch with a beer and a bracket that is already busted,” the petition reads.

It’s a noble cause, I guess, because this really is the best two-day stretch of the sporting calendar. But if America’s workers already are more or less stealing $1.9 billion in wages because they’re distracted by some 12th-seeded dynamo, do we need to make if official? Why not just keep the whole winking-acceptance aspect of it? That way, the people who don’t give a whit about the NCAA tournament can keep the nation’s economy humming along while the rest of us keep the nation’s quasi-legal gambling industry afloat. It’s a win-win.

Besides, people working a 9-5 job can get home in plenty of time for the eight night games on the schedule each day.

Now the day after the Super Bowl: That should be a national holiday, if only because the NFL could probably jerry-rig the schedule to have the game played on the day before Presidents’ Day. Or we could make Presidents’ Day be the day after the Super Bowl every year, because there only are five living people who could possibly lodge a protest.