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The Washington Post

Despite calling the Republican presumptive nominee a good friend, the Patriots quarterback will not be making an appearance at the Republican National Convention.

The quarterback 'prefers not to eat fruits' according to his private chef, who served up an inside look at his super-healthy diet.

The Patriots quarterback crumpled to the ground, causing New England fans to have their playoff lives flash before their eyes.

Well, probably not, but the Patriots quarterback does appreciate the shout-out on the Bruins goalie's Winter Classic mask.

The Patriots quarterback gets less than 500 votes more than his Panthers counterpart, out of nearly 1.5 million cast among the pair.

And to think, it's still not over! (DeflateGate, that is. Also, 2015.)

The filing emphasizes that, while the quarterback denies anything to do with deflated footballs, the NFL's collective bargaining agreement mandates that he should have been fined, not suspended.

The Patriots quarterback says he doesn't want to 'blame the officiating' for New England's defeat in Denver, but he pretty much did.

It may or may not have changed a play at the line of scrimmage, but it was certainly a solid troll job.

Of course, the Patriots may not even make it that far. Right?

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