Batman versus Superman? Pshaw.
We, however, decided to take a (not so) serious approach to compare these two brothers from another mother. Does the doughnut taste like the Slurpee? Does the Slurpee taste like the doughnut? What does Wild Cherry taste like anyway? What does it all mean?
Our tale of the tape:
The doughnut is 99 cents. A medium (22 ounces) Slurpee is $1.49. But, you guys, you can get them BOTH for $2.
They are both so, so red. Red Wedding red. So it's a tie, though somehow the doughnut manages to be brown on the outside and pink on the inside. Because physics.
Mmmmmm, tough call. My tongue and fingers may never return to their natural tint, but advantage goes to the doughnut. Merely touching the icing left my fingertips stained even though I wiped it off immediately. Scary.
Slurpee, game, set match (and, no, I'm not going to apologize for mixing sports metaphors).
Depends whether we're talking about least or most offensive. The doughnut sans icing is acceptable, as far as 7-Eleven pastry expectations go. Taken as a whole, though, the doughnut and Slurpee both boast a certain eau de Robitussin. The doughnut icing is particularly antiseptic. Advantage, uh, Slurpee?