— Did Beyoncé lip-sync at Obama’s second Inauguration? Yeah, kinda, but only because she didn’t have time to rehearse with the band, so she sang along to a pre-recorded track. But you probably already forgot about that, because she’s Queen Bey. Remember when Ashley Judd was running for senator? Democrats desperately hoped she wouldn’t run, Republicans desperately hoped she would. After months of teasing, the actress just kind of disappeared. And about that $15,000 wedding present that Gov. Bob McDonnell’s daughter Cailin accepted from family friend Jonnie Williams, note to all you future brides out there: If your dad is the governor of Virginia, be very careful about the catering bill.
— If you, like Reese Witherspoon, get pulled over on your way home from a party where you’ve had a little too much to drink, don’t say “Do you know who I am?” Or, if you’re Alec Baldwin with a new MSNBC show, don’t shout anti-gay slurs to the paparazzi. Or, if you’re Jimmy Kimmel, don’t laugh when a kid says you should kill all the people in China during one of your talk show bits.
— Paula Deen’s admission, in a deposition, that she used racial epithets didn’t sit well with the Food Network and all her other sponsors, who ditched the Southern fried cooking queen. When she was forced to apologize, Jennifer Lopez learned it’s probably a bad career move to sing “Happy Birthday” to a dictator. Some people thought it was a little off-putting that first lady Michelle Obama presented the best picture Oscar at the Academy Awards — even with those military aides in the background.
— People who should really stop talking: Michael Douglas, who gave us waaaay too much information about how he got cancer. Rielle Hunter, who issued yet another apology in order to sell more books about her affair with John Edwards. And Lance Armstrong, who finally came clean — but it was too late, you dope.
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