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From Angelina Jolie to Kim K, how Donald Trump rates women in new Howard Stern tapes

Broadcast personality Howard Stern with Donald Trump. (Louis Lanzano/AP)

There’s a lot happening in the newly published trove of interviews that Donald Trump gave to radio host Howard Stern, which Newsweek wrote about Monday. Because when you have 15 hours of the notoriously foul-mouthed shock jock egging on the braggadocios then-reality TV star to say crazy things, you get … well, crazy things: on Trump’s sex life, porn (he’s “not into it”), germophobia and his celebrity feuds (we get it, you realllly don’t like Rosie O’Donnell).

One of the strongest threads running through the interviews, which took place from 1993 through 2015 and recordings of which were anonymously given to the website Factbase, is Stern and Trump rating the looks of famous women. The pair enjoy it so much that at one point, Stern suggests a TV show in which Trump judges women. The real estate mogul replies, “Now, that may be the best idea of all.”

Trump considers himself an expert on women’s looks: Good hair is important (“hair is my thing”) and lip implants are a no-no (“You know the worst thing, though, on women? It’s the pumped lips.”) His bona fides? Stern establishes them by asking whether it’s true that Trump has “banged some of the greatest beauties on the planet.”

“True. Some of the greats in history,” Trump confirms.

We’re still going through the transcripts, but here’s Trump’s analysis of female celebrities:

Kim Kardashian: “She’s got a huge trunk … it’s seriously big.”

Anne Hathaway: “She lived in Trump Tower. I like all people that live in my building. Anybody that lives in my building, even if they’re really unattractive, I consider them to be beautiful. … I wasn’t a fan at all, but she’s grown on me.”

Halle Berry: “I love her upper body. …  I think her skin is beautiful. Yes, I’ve seen her, you know, many times. What I hate about Halle Berry is that there’s always, like, drama around her. It’s always like fighting automobile accidents. You know, fistfights, boyfriends, fighting ex-husbands, fighting for the child. … And she’s been around a long time. She’s fine.”

Jessica Chastain: “She’s certainly not, she’s not hot.”

Elin Nordegren, Tiger Woods’s ex-wife:  “A solid nine.” Later, he clarifies why she didn’t get a better score: “Well, 10 is a very, very sacred territory.”

Charlize Theron: “To be honest, I think Ivanka is much better-looking than her.”

Angelina Jolie: “I don’t think she’s got good skin. I don’t think she’s got a great face. I think her lips are too big, to be honest with you. You know they look like too big.  She’s a seven, but a seven is not a 10.”

Anna Nicole Smith: “She had the best body. She had the best face. She had the best hair I’ve ever seen.”

Stephanie Seymour: “Awfully close” to perfect.

Paulina Porizkova: “Gorgeous.”

Marla Maples: “A beautiful structure, no question about that.”

Melania Trump: “Considered one of the great beauties of the world.”