NEW YORK — In the days leading up to the start of the NCAA tournament, people spend endless hours dissecting the pros and cons of various matchups throughout their brackets.
So who would win? To find out, The Washington Post asked both sides for their breakdown of the matchup, and who would come out on top.
First up is Michael Garcia, West Virginia’s Mountaineer.
“I feel like I would win,” Garcia told The Post in an exclusive interview. “As the Mountaineer, I’m very resourceful in my environment. I wouldn’t go right at him. I would go around, and I would use my rifle to my advantage, but I don’t think I’d even have to fire it, though.”
Really? He wouldn’t even use his rifle? So what would he do?
“I feel like I’d just put him in a corner, if I really had to, and then use my slyness to get around behind him and take him down that way,” Garcia said. “He’s got a little size on me, but I think I’m quicker.”
So that’s the West Virginia view point.
Now here’s Blake Loggins, Stephen F. Austin’s Lumberjack, on why he would come out on top.
“He’s got a long rifle, so all I’ve got to do is use my lumberjack skills to dodge that one bullet,” Loggins said. “Then he’s got to reload his long rifle, which takes two-and-a-half minutes. So I just come up to him and I get him with the axe.”
All right, so let’s be honest here: Both of these guys have serious flaws in their arguments.
Beginning with the mountaineer: You have a rifle; it’s probably a good idea to use it. And using your “slyness” to sneak around the lumberjack? That seems like a risky proposition — especially since the lumberjack has a giant axe at his disposal, and certainly has a strength advantage.
As for the lumberjack: you’re going to “use your lumberjack skills” to dodge a bullet? I didn’t know that lumberjacks were like Neo from The Matrix. That seems like a pretty significant weakness.
That being said, we’re going to side with the lumberjack in this one. Yes, the mountaineer has the rifle. But the bet here is that the mountaineer would miss with his one shot — and, from there, the lumberjack would have a massive advantage.
What do you think? Submit your answer in the comments below.