Many of you knew about longtime Hax commenter Redheadwglasses1’s battle with cancer. Commenter eldots wrote yesterday to let us know that Red has passed away.

Red was known in this community for what eldots described as her “outspoken, witty and engaging” comments. She was also known for her openness. Red shared stories about her life, her friends and her family. And she shared her diagnosis with cancer – a struggle that she was supported through by many in this community.

Here are some of her recent posts:


We’ve set up this page to remember Red and to celebrate her contributions to this community.

We asked Red shortly before she passed whether she’d be okay with remembering her in this way. Her response, in typical Red fashion: “I gots no shame.”

Red also said that when she looks back at her interactions with this group, “I am often proud at how far I have come in evolving to be a more open minded, more compassionate person … ”

In that spirit, here is a small sampling of what Red brought to these pages:

8-22-2013 on: Getting a reluctant spouse to exercise, lose weight

I have a coworker who has raised her kids to believe that sugar is a drug. Not just the sugar you might add to coffee, cereal, baking, etc., but all foods that contain any sucrose, fructose, etc., although they do eat a minimum of fruit. But they truly believe it’s a drug akin to meth and cocaine. So much so, that one of her homeschooled kids was taking a college course and wrote a paper on sugar being a drug, but used horrible science to try to justify it and the paper got marked all over in red for its poorly supported ideas. All four family members aren’t just slender, they are *gaunt* and ashen looking.

I’d rather have a doughnut.

8-14-2011 on: He left his wife but wants to watch baby’s delivery

My boyfriend was divorced three months before his (second) child was born. She had been cheating throughout their entire marriage. I asked him once if she let him be present for the child’s birth. “Of course she did, that’s my son!” I responded that, um, no, she did him a FAVOR by allowing him in that room after the deterioration of their relationship. She didn’t have to, and as crappy as a wife I think she was, that was a generous, caring thing for her to do for him.

12-13-2012  on: Couple wants to replicate school of hard knocks for their kids

There are poor people who raise kids who turn out to be resentful of wealthy people, who are bratty, and who contribute little or nothing to society but spreading their DNA around. There are rich people who raise awesome kids who are courteous, work hard, get good grades, and improve the world.

Money is nothing but a tool. Use it wisely.

7-30-2013 on: Husband’s silent treatment has ripple effect through family

I just got off the phone with my boyfriend. He had an unexpected windfall of a few hundred dollars and wants to treat me to supper! Yay! (I immediately was thinking SUSHI, which costs us about $100 with tip.) Then he says, “What do you think about going to Buffalo Wild Wings tonight?” Heh. THat’ll cost us $20 if we even bother to order beers.

Then I presented today’s topic to him and asked him what he thought, he said he wished I’d give him the silent treatment during hockey games.

2-9-2012 on: They tried, it didn’t work, but now he’s back

Last night at the bookstore, a table display of books caught my eye — all love/romance/work on your marriage books, for Valentine’s Day of course. One book had a title like, “How to get married in the next 365 days.” I opened it to a random page and read.

Nutshell: “Women keep cleaner homes than men, so you’ll have to get used to and accept a man’s dirty home. Also be prepared for all the brown leather furniture you’ll encounter as you date and look for a man to marry.”


5-23-2013 on: Third wheel ex controls the relationship

If you break up with him, I bet you, $10,000 and an hour with my man (who is FINE, gnomesane?) he will not find anyone else to date him under those conditions, because you are the biggest suckah on the face of the earth.

Red will certainly be missed. Please feel free to share your own thoughts and memories in the comments.