Fancy Farm, Kentucky's annual party for stump speeches, mutton and bingo, happened over the weekend. There were stump speeches. There was tons of mutton. Like nine tons of pork and mutton. And there was bingo. On the national stage, the barbecue and bingo was not of much import, unfortunately, but here's a quick round-up of the best one-liners of the weekend — either from the speech makers, the event planners or those assessing the performances.
10. "When you agree with what they say, cheer. If you disagree, boo. And then shut up and let them go on with their speech. Fair enough?"
— State Supreme Court candidate Bill Cunningham, giving the audience advice they didn't take.
9. “I heard last year people got arrested for fist-fighting. I expected it to be a little more mouthier than what it was.”
— David Knight, a college student visiting Fancy Farm from West Virginia, and interviewed by the Independent in Ashland, Ky.
8. "We just don't want to be viewed as a WWF (professional wrestling match) or Jerry Springer show. We want it to be portrayed in a good way, like we're not just a bunch of rowdies."
— Fancy Farm organizer Mark Wilson, to the Louisville Courier-Journal.
7. "Let's look at our two U.S. senators, if they're still sitting behind me, I can't see, I think one of them may have left. The junior is Senator Out-of-Town. The senior is Senator Out-of-Touch and Out-of Time."
— Democrat Jack Conway, Kentucky's attorney general, who is running for governor in 2015.
6. “I’m sorry, I had just to get one last photo of the senator before Kentucky voters retire him in November."
5. “Barack Obama has been a disaster. I guess that’s what we get for electing someone with no experience. He was only two years into his first big job when he started campaigning for the next one. Sound familiar?"
— Republican Sen. Mitch McConnell, who is running for reelection this year.
4. “There once was a woman who came from Kentucky, who thought in politics she'd be lucky. So she flew to L.A. for a Hollywood bash. She came home in flash, with buckets of cash."
— Poet Rand Paul. His day job is working as a Republican senator for Kentucky. Another verse went, “Her first vote is for Reid. As for Kentucky, it’s too bad indeed." Another went, "To the liberals she sells her soul, the same ones who hate Kentucky coal." Here's the whole thing.
3. “If Mitch McConnell were a TV show he'd be 'Mad Men.' Treating women unfairly, stuck in 1968, and ending this season.”
2. "I had four sandwiches yesterday. It seemed like a good idea at the time."
1. "I can make empty promises. I can raise my voice, and I can say words like jobs, jobs and jobs. And at the end of the day, I'll be completely honest ... [I] don't care about you."