Writing about Glenn Beck's demise at Fox News, in 2011, Washington Post columnist Dana Milbank observed that the conservative provocateur had "pushed further into dark conspiracies, urging his viewers to hoard food in their homes and to buy freeze-dried meals for sustenance when civilization breaks down."

On Wednesday night, during the first commercial break on "The O'Reilly Factor," I watched a family gather for a turkey dinner that had been freeze-dried 25 years earlier. An alien spaceship hovered outside the window. Because you "never know what could happen," I was told, I should buy a Harvest Right freeze dryer.

Now that dozens of major advertisers have abandoned him, after  a New York Times report on sexual harassment settlements, Bill O'Reilly is in freeze-dryer territory. That's not a great place to be.

Who is still buying airtime on his show? Well, there's the Wonder Hanger Max, "guaranteed to triple your closet space"; Sea-Bond, which is sticking to O'Reilly like dentures to your gums; and something called the Scottevest, which features 26 — that's right, 26! — pockets, thus enabling you to carry everything you own on your body at all times.

O'Reilly's remaining sponsors do include such big-name brands as Crowne Plaza hotels and Verizon Fios, but many others seem to have been called up from the advertising minor leagues. Here is a list of the ads that aired on Wednesday's episode of "The Factor" in the D.C. market:

First commercial break

  • Life Credit Co. (offering loans for cancer patients)
  • Wonder Hanger Max
  • Harvest Right

Second commercial break

  • "The Son" on AMC (a new show starring Pierce Brosnan)
  • Crowne Plaza
  • MyPillow (inventor Mike Lindell personally guarantees it will be the most comfortable pillow you'll ever own!)
  • "The First 100 Days" on Fox News
  • Watchable (it's an app)
  • Verizon Fios

Third commercial break

  • Rosland Capital (retirement accounts backed by gold and silver)
  • ClearChoice (dental implants)
  • Scottevest
  • Fox News (just in case you forgot which channel you're watching)

Fourth commercial break

  • Stein Mart
  • Mattress Firm
  • Angie's List
  • SimpliSafe (home security)
  • Fox News Radio

Fifth commercial break

  • Visiting Angels (home care for the elderly)
  • "The First 100 Days" (yes, another house ad)
  • Nationwide Infiniti (Maryland car dealership)
  • Next Day Blinds
  • M&T Bank
  • Sea-Bond
  • Invisalign

Sixth commercial break

  • "Forge of Empires" (video game)
  • Smart Mouth (for dry mouth and bad breath)
  • Entyvio (for ulcerative colitis and Crohn's disease)
  • Lumber Liquidators