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  1. Meet someone on Tinder.
  2. Chose a date spot with Dateini.
  3. Charm him/her with “Pick-Up Lines!”. (Results not guaranteed.)
  4. Consult Txtwar to see when you should next contact him/her.
  5. Quantify your sex with Spreadsheets, which promises to make it better.
  6. Get serious with date ideas and gift suggestions from HeroBoyfriend.
  7. Fall in love with those 36 questions the New York Times recommended.
  8. Endure your first brutal argument with Fix a Fight.
  9. Download Expressing Needs, because he/she says you’re uptight.
  10. Agree to better divide chores on Lovendar.
  11. Deploy BroApp to fend off your SO’s frequent complaints that you’re not there for him/her.
  12. Hastily install DreamDay so you don’t forget another anniversary or milestone.
  13. Eventually agree to download Couple Tracker to your phone.
  14. Consult the fine strangers at AgonyApp about your escalating doubts.
  15. Hire Breakup Shop to end it for you; this can’t be what love’s about.
  16. Recover your pride/dignity with Breakup Rx.
  17. Meet someone on Tinder and do it all over again.