Double-length to make up for yesterday's missing edition:

-- "Don’t read this if you aren’t him."

-- "He has violated a couple of the most basic tenets of Concealing Your War Crimes. Rule No. 1: Do not write a memoir about your war crimes."

-- "Somewhere in the United States, a teen has no doubt broken up with somebody using Snapchat."

-- "'THE U.S. NAVY WILL NO LONGER COMMUNICATE EXCLUSIVELY IN CAPITAL LETTERS,' went the lede. 'YOUNG SAILORS ACCUSTOMED TO TEXTING SEE ALL-CAPS ORDERS AS A FORM OF SHOUTING!'"

-- "The only folks QE has helped are workers and investors. Losers: Folks with a poor knowledge of German economic history."

-- "I’ve used the phrase ‘the audacity of pessimism’. Only when things look bleak will people get round to doing anything."

-- "It’s not like bees are delivering your mail or making you dinner or sewing your clothes, Cinderella-style."

-- "Detroit police, mismanaged and understaffed, solve less than 10 percent of crimes."

-- "In your home, you should be able to do whatever you want for how long you want without worrying about someone spying on you."