This is your brain on data. ( Flickr user Matthew Murdoch/CC )

Ugh, what a week. What a terrible, terrible no-good week, what with the cromnibus and the Rolling Stone fiasco and everything generally being awful.

The way I see it we have two options: we can drown our sorrows with alcohol, or we can drown them with data! Below, a 100-proof collection of the week's finest charts and maps, with identifying information redacted, for you to test your knowledge on. Dive in and let the numbers wash over you, and let me know how you did.

1

So there's someone retiring from Congress this year, who served with a guy who served with a guy who who served with a guy who who served with a guy who who served with a guy who who served with a guy who who served with a guy who served in the first Congress. Who is it?

Doc Hastings
Ralph Hall
John Dingell
Michelle Bachmann

2

In the past few days, a single event inspired three competing Twitter hashtags. What are they?

#sonygate, #interviewgate and #sonyghazi
#torturereport, #rectalfeeding and #rectalhydration
#cromnibus, #crapnibus and #yourmomnibus
#stormageddon, #hellastorm and #bayareastorm

3

These are census tracts. What's the common denominator between them?

They all have a higher gonorrhea rate than the national average.
They're all richer than Washington, DC.
People who live here drop their g's more than average
They all have a lower per-capita GDP than Burundi.

4

FiveThirtyEight charted the distribution of liberal and conservative something-or-others who graduated from top colleges - what are they?

Supreme Court clerks.
Cheerleaders.
Doctors.
Baristas.

5

I'm going to be straight with you: this is probably the easiest one on here.

Share of tweets including the phrase "hella"
Lettuce production, in tons.
Levels of drought.
Levels of air pollution.

6

Whoa, this is freaking cool. What is it?

Just a trippy thing a guy made to look at while he was stoned.
A visualization of tides.
A visualization of magnetic fields.
A visualization of ocean temperature

7

What does the green mean?

Annual Christmas tree production.
Kilograms of marijuana consumed annually.
Deer populations.
Residents claiming Irish ancestry.

8

People are not very good at estimating something. What is it?

Price Is Right prize package values.
Student loan debt.
Price of their neighbor's houses.
Monthly mortgage payments.

9

Something crashed this week. What is it?

The black market price, per ounce, of John Boehner's tears.
The price of oil.
The price per square foot of a parking space in San Francisco.
Barack Obama's favorability.

10

That's quite a striking gradient. What does it represent?

Google searches for "can I wear jorts after Labor Day."
Google searches for "seasonal affective disorder."
Google searches for "Vermont tuxedo."
Google searches for "moose stew."

Your score: 0 / 10