Look at me

I’m going for a walk. Look at me.

(Patrick Semansky/AP)

But there are some bad people out there. Very bad and very evil people. They don’t want to look at me.

(Alex Brandon/AP)

So I’ll tell the police to clear the way for me.


Tear gas? Don’t look at me!


Get out of the way so other people can look at me.


Who are you looking at? Me!

(Patrick Semansky/AP)

I like walking a few steps ahead of everyone, so you can get a good look at me.

(Patrick Semansky/AP)

Never mind the writing on the wall — just look at me.

(Patrick Semansky/AP)

And this wonderful lineup of tough guys — I have the power to make them all look at me.

(Tom Brenner/Reuters)

Remember I told you about vicious dogs and ominous weapons? Now, they are right next to me.

Shawn Thew/EPA-EFE/REX/Shutterstock
Tom Brenner/Reuters
LEFT: Shawn Thew/EPA-EFE/REX/Shutterstock RIGHT: Tom Brenner/Reuters

Look at me in front of this church building. Which church is this? Who cares? I’m not here for the church. I’m here for me.

(Brendan Smialowski/AFP/Getty Images)

My aides can’t wait to hear from me. But I have nothing to say, because this is just a photo stunt. So don’t look at the big microphone. Look at me.

(Tom Brenner/Reuters)

Now I’m holding a Bible. Look at me.

Tom Brenner/Reuters
Patrick Semansky/AP
LEFT: Tom Brenner/Reuters RIGHT: Patrick Semansky/AP

Should I say, “You’re fired"?

(Patrick Semansky/AP)

Oops, wrong show. I’m president now — look at me!

(Tom Brenner/Reuters)

Okay. Stunt done. Heading home.

(Shawn Thew/EPA)

Last chance now. Look at me.

Absurd America examines the idiosyncrasies of life in the United States. Follow on Twitter, Instagram, or join the Facebook group.

Sign up to receive Sergio Peçanha’s columns in your inbox as soon as they’re published

Watch a related Opinions video:

More from Opinions:

William J. Barber II and Jonathan Wilson-Hartgrove: Trump’s use of the Bible was obscene. He should try reading the words inside it.

Colbert I. King: Trump desecrates the character of St. John’s church for foul political purposes

Karen Tumulty: This country desperately needs a leader who knows the difference between tough and strong

Sergio Peçanha: A viral love affair

Sergio Peçanha: Lessons from the confinement

Sign up to receive Opinions columns like these in your inbox six days a week

We noticed you’re blocking ads!

Keep supporting great journalism by turning off your ad blocker. Or purchase a subscription for unlimited access to real news you can count on.
Unblock ads
Questions about why you are seeing this? Contact us