There are many things I will miss about the Obama White House: having a first family that genuinely seems happy to be a family; a president who valued diplomacy; a first lady who was highly educated, stylish, graceful and who tried to be a positive role model. What I won’t miss is the seemingly endless barrage of attacks on her for the most mundane things. In a list that is by no means exhaustive, here’s a roundup of the vitriol I can’t wait to say goodbye to.

1. She expressed some mixed feelings about being proud of America as a black woman, which was obviously unpatriotic.

2. She’s “strikingly ungracious.” (Jim Geraghty, writing for National Review)

3. She doesn’t look like a first lady (and she did push-ups). (Virginia voter Bobbie Lussier)

4. She disrespected the flag, as determined by lip readings of Obama whispering something inaudible to her husband during a ceremony. (Washington Times, American Thinker, Debbie Schlussel)

5. She weighs too much to care about health: “The problem is — and dare I say this — it doesn’t look like Michelle Obama follows her own nutritional, dietary advice. And then we hear that she’s out eating ribs at 1,500 calories a serving with 141 grams of fat per serving, yeah it does — what do you mean, what do I mean?” (Rush Limbaugh)

6. She “needs to drop a few” pounds before she can be taken seriously on the issue of nutrition. (Keith Ablow, prominent member of the Fox News “Medical A-Team”)

7. She eats too much, as demonstrated by a cartoon of a chubby Michelle chowing down on a burger and fries, telling a skinny Barack to “shut up and pass the bacon!” (Big Government)

8. She didn’t support dessert enough, and she “cannot trust parents to make decisions for their own children.” (Sarah Palin)

9. She forced children in day care to be weighed. (Urban legend, debunked by Snopes)

10. She has “no business being involved” in what people eat. (New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie)

11. She’s a “feminist nightmare” for focusing on her family. (Michelle Cottle, writing in Politico)

12. She is actually a man, and she murdered Joan Rivers to cover it up. (Alex Jones)

13. She’s not classy enough and is an “atrocity” as first lady: “She makes a fool of herself — every time she comes on TV, I have to turn it off. Laura Bush was so classy, and that’s what we really need again.” (Laurie Boilard, quoted by Bloomberg Politics at a party for a Republican candidate’s wife)

14. She dared to talk about the enslaved people who built the White House.

15. She is an “ape in heels.” (Pamela Ramsey Taylor, director of Clay County Development Corp., Clay, W.Va., who later swore she was not racist.)

16. She has a “gorilla face.” (Patrick Rushing, mayor of Airway Heights, Wash.)

17. She is a “poor gorilla” who “needs to focus on getting a total makeover (especially the hair), instead of planning vacations.” (Georgia schoolteacher Jane Wood Allen)

18. She put her left elbow on a table once. (Salon)

19. She ” ‘voluntarily surrendered’ her law license in 1993. after a Federal Judge gave her the choice between surrendering her license or standing trial for Insurance fraud!” (Chain email)

20. She went “to Buckingham Palace in a sweater.” (Oscar de la Renta)

21. She’s President Obama’s “baby mama.” (Fox News)

22. She wore shorts.