I admit, I was prepared to mock Maryland’s new football uniforms, especially since they were unveiled at a fashion show, like the strangest episode of “Project Runway” ever.
But then I saw the black jersey-gold pants-black helmet combination.
Maybe you don’t — a lot of people are anti-gold pants — but don’t worry. There are 32 combinations of uniforms from which to choose. That does seem a little excessive, because the Terps play just 12 games. They could actually have costume changes at halftime.
Maryland has red pants, gold pants, white pants and black pants. They have red jerseys, gold jerseys, white jerseys and black jerseys. They have more clothes than Kim Kardashian.
Throw in two helmets and you’ve got a lot of possible looks. One helmet is gray with what appears to be a turtle pattern with the yellow and black checks of the Maryland state flag running down the middle like a racing stripe. The other is black, with the same checked racing stripes. Love the black one. The gray one? Meh.
Under Armour, of course, designed this collection, which will challenge locker room attendants like never before. Should we coordinate the wearing of gold pants with the Redskins? Which combination are we using this week? Where are we going to store all this . . . fashion? (I’ve got a good closet guy, Randy Edsall. Give me a call.)
Of course, what all these uniform combinations lack is the players’ names on the backs of the jerseys. This has been a hotly debated topic since Edsall announced the change, one of his new rules that are supposed to bring more discipline and teamwork to the Terps. I’ll miss the names, personally, but the vendors should sell a lot of programs at Byrd Stadium. (I’m certainly not against all of Edsall’s rules; I love “no do-rags or caps in Gossett Team House”; I’d like Edsall to patrol local restaurants during the offseason.)
But if you think Edsall is a control freak, just because he wants to control all aspects of the team, you are wrong. Apparently fashion is his Achilles’ heel; I’m guessing he’s never had 16 combinations in his wardrobe in his whole life. (I’m not sure I have, now that I think about it. Maybe during my sorority year. All those plaid skirts and monogrammed sweaters. Shudder.)
But Edsall wants nothing to do with putting together just the right outfit for, say, a date with West Virginia. He’ll leave that decision to his players.
“I told the captains, you’re the guys that are going to have to decide what we’re wearing because there are too many options for me,” Edsall said.
“The good thing is I think it gives us tremendous opportunities. We might not wear the same uniform all year long. To incorporate all our colors in those uniforms — it’s unprecedented really in college football.”
The captains will get help; Maryland is running a Twitter campaign to allow fans to vote on their favorite combination for next week’s opener against the Miami Hurricanes, who probably wish all they had to worry about was what to wear to College Park.